Warning! Lots of opinionated comments and blabbering below…
As a teacher, I have learned to appreciate my well-deserved summers. I'm not one to take trips, go to the beach, socialize with friends, or probably most other activities that people engage in during the summer. And, because we have no children (other than the four-legged kind), I'm able to be selfish and go about whatever business I plan. On my spring break this year I planned out and conducted my two-week EVP experiment that many of you followed. When it ended I was already excitedly planning what I was going to do during the summer months, including ordering a big pile of books on the topic of spirit communication. With more time to be consistent, I would continue my EVP research. I could finally get tons of analysis of some previous paranormal investigations completed. I was also pumped to start thinking and planning some séance experiences for this fall. And… of course, I was very excited to blog my way through it all on The Big Séance.
Well, I've done most of these things. Unfortunately, the results of my recent EVP research would bore most of you. A lot of VERY quiet and VERY questionable moments that I continuously label as “possible” communication or “possible” EVP. I get nervous about the possibility of my hard drive filling to the max with these “possible” audio clips, and sorting through them and labeling them is becoming a chore. I've stopped saving so many of these and only make note of them. Either I'm doing something wrong or I'm not very patient. Or… maybe I'm not supposed to be an EVP master like Randall Keller. 🙂 It probably shouldn't ruin my day, but sometimes after spending hours reviewing one session with no gems, it gets me down and I begin to wonder what the point is.
I've continued to occasionally experiment with radio sweep on my clock radio, which was brought on by possible (there's that word again… see a theme here?) encouragement from spirit in a dream as well as an EVP response a while back. I've done more research with the spirit box, which I was very excited about, but have continued to be disappointed by, or maybe I'm just too skeptical about responses that may be coming through. Or… maybe I just need to get out of the house and record elsewhere. Or… maybe I just need to get out of the house. 🙂
By now I've read most of the books. One thing I didn't consider is that these books would take me on a wild ride through several tangents and ITC topics that are interesting me. My mistake? I jumped right from one book to the next due to my addiction of knowledge and need to gain lots of it in a small amount of time. I didn't stop to take a break between each book, or to even think about or attempt any of the concepts inside each individual book. Now that I've realized this, I plan on taking a step back. I'll review each book by taking some notes, researching more of the techniques or concepts more deeply.
And finally, I've developed a kind of paranormal attitude that I'm not liking one bit. I'm a member of several online groups or circles of different paranormal and spiritual people and I'm learning a lot about other nerds and “crazies” like me. I find myself too easily criticizing the person who sees the obvious dust particle or reflection of the sun or a beam of light as the beautiful spirit orb whose name is Ralph, who is apparently in the photo to protect the person being photographed while sitting at their table at Applebees. Whaaaat?! “What you are seeing here in this water scrying example is a sprite. I also see a native American.” Why is there always a native American? And who am I to judge or get upset, anyway? I'm the one planning séances and sitting here waiting for my clock radio to talk to me based on a dream. And you should know that I'm interested in the spirit box. I'm interested in all things ITC. I want to be able to meditate successfully. I want to channel. I want to experience astral travel. I really want to hear and see what others do. As you may know, I've struggled to balance the “spiritual” nerd and the “paranormal” nerd inside myself. You may think there's not a big difference, but trust me, they are completely different circles of people.
And so… I've decided I'm just burned out. Or maybe it's just the July blues and I really need for school to start (and don't worry, it will… less than two weeks away). Maybe I just need to get grounded and go be a “normal person” for a while. My friend Marilyn tells me I need to go and stick my feet in the dirt. Not a lot of dirt around here, but maybe she's right. If you drive down my street and see me sitting in the yard looking like a patient from One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, perhaps staring off into the distance while chewing on a blade of grass, just wave and drive on by. If you're invited to my home and you notice I'm hoarding chicken carcasses under the bed like the girl from Girl Interrupted… well… just call for help, please.
Last night I prayed to whoever would listen, perhaps my spirit guide, or my totem, or an Archangel, or maybe even Ralph. Hopefully someone can help me figure out what I'm supposed to do or not do. I hope you'll understand if I take a blogging break for a while. You may even enjoy a break from reading it. 🙂
I hope I haven't offended anyone. Am I still talking? (Are you still reading?)