Coming Out of the Paranormal/Spiritual Closet…

This question goes out to any of my readers who are truly paranormal/spiritual nerds. I really do want to hear from you.


How do you balance your “paranormal/spiritual” life and interests with your “normal” life in the “real world” (such as job, Walmart, family situations, etc) where it might not be as socially accepted to be that nerdy? 


This question may seem a bit odd to some of you. If you think it’s odd, maybe you’re just not as hard-core as some of us nerdy folk. I’ve thought about this in the last week. It has become increasingly harder to NOT share my interests, my experimenting, and my blogging with the people I spend time with at work and other places. I’ve experienced the looks, the nervous giggles, and the silent stare and nod before they nervously change topics. It is very interesting for sure. 

Of course, some of you may work with the paranormal or spiritual as your occupation. First of all, I’m jealous… but for you, balancing these things might not be a problem, but maybe certain situations are still just as interesting? 


How fine is this line for you? Is there one? Have you come out of the paranormal/spiritual closet?




About Patrick Keller

Patrick Keller is an educator, blogger, and the host of the Big Séance Podcast, which is a place for paranerds to have an open discussion on all things paranormal, but specifically topics like ghosts and hauntings, paranormal research, spirit communication, psychics and mediums, and life after death. He’s the founder of the now inactive Missouri Spirit Seekers and has spent a lot of time experimenting with spirit communication tools and techniques, such as EVP. Patrick also has a passion for spending hours at a time in cemeteries and loves cemetery photography. Visit! View all posts by Patrick Keller

19 responses to “Coming Out of the Paranormal/Spiritual Closet…

  • LinT

    Hi Patrick,I resonate with this aspect, being iinterested in all things ‘unearthly’! The birth of blogs like yours & CE etc are a blessing. I really have to choose who I talk to about such things.Even family members tend to keep you at arm’s length if the subject arises.I guess all the people who think we’re nut cases just have to wait until they see/hear or feel something for themselves.Of course most people are afraid & they tend to ridicule from this stance.I think it’s funny that everyone believes in electricity yet it can’t be seen!

  • Ash

    Well to be honest – I’ve only discussed this stuff with select people – you kind of know which of your friends and family will be receptive and which ones won’t, you know? I feel like there’s 3 categories for me: 1) Paranormal (i.e. do ghosts exist?). This one is pretty acceptable to most people. The majority of my friends are open to this and we’ve all sat around and told a ghost story or two.

    Category 2) Spirituality: I haven’t discussed this in depth with anybody but one or two people (besides my husband). It’s so far out there (even for me, and I’m a convert lol) that I just don’t think the majority of my Christian, Catholic, and Muslim turned atheist friends are ready to handle something like that. It took me a good long while to come around to it and I’m pretty damn rational. Though one of the friends I’ve discussed it in depth with was a self proclaimed “agnostic with a hint of deism” who spends the majority of his time posting politically and relgiously inflammatory speech on facebook trying to get his conservative Christian friend base to wake up to the fact that at least parts of the bible are fictional nonsense. For someone who is so vehemently anti-bible and makes no bones about arguing it on a daily basis, he was pretty receptive to notions of spirituality (I only gave him the science-based stuff and a little bit of the philosophy… we didn’t get into aliens and conspiracy theories lol well, not too much anyway). I think it was mostly because he’d never heard anything like it before and was more just digesting it than anything – certainly never an “anti-religion” that preached self-responsibility rather than attributing everything to an unseen deity that hangs out somewhere in the sky playing with humans like chess pawns.

    Category 3) for me, is the psychic stuff. I’m not sure which is weirder – psychic abilities or spirituality, though the two really go hand in hand (for me, anyway). I have told a few people about my encounters with spirits – in a more “psychic” format rather than just “ghost story” type deal. The reactions have ranged considerably. My mom thinks it is cool. My friend Gretchen is into psychics so she finds it to be an interesting insight. My husband is a little creeped out lol. My friend Mike wants to believe me because he knows I’m a rational person but is skeptical until he sees it for himself. Blair is encouraging because she is also sensitive and has explored this path herself. And then another friend of mine went so far as to tell me to be careful, don’t clear my mind, it’s a demon, blah blah blah. So yeah. Wide range of reactions, mostly (and pleasantly) positive.

    As far as balance goes- when I first got into spirituality I became very ungrounded. I had a big case of “What’s the point of this existence? I want to go home.” Nothing seemed to matter anymore except personal relationships – work? Who cares. It didn’t matter. None of it’s real! For about 3 weeks after I came back from vegas I felt like I was walking around in a dream. Everything was foggy. Slowly I came back down to “reality.” It took a while to find a good balance, in that respect.

  • bajamerson

    I just have to note that I LOVE the title of this blog and I know I can relate. If you haven’t read it already, here’s a little background:

    I’m still struggling with it in public with “ordinary” folks, and I’m sort of learning to push myself to talk about my spiritual beliefs. In fact, I’m going to a charity event this coming saturday (which WILL be blogged about), and I’m SO nervous about it. Mainly because I’m PUSHING myself to talk about it with people who may not believe in what I do. But I might be surprised and run into people who have been also suppressing things…Who knows!

  • suburbanclairvoyant

    HA HA! I call it coming out of the Clair Closet!! So funny to see you have a reference to coming out as well…

    So for me I use it all the time, but sometimes in…more delicate situations I just don’t call it that. I can tell when and where is appropriate. I’ve got two businesses – Teaching kids to trust their instincts is my “real” job, you know, legit. Reading, mentoring and “clair counselling” are my other “job”. They are both totally based on the same thing, and flow over back and forth to each other all of the time. But the thing that sucks is that for some I’ve found there has to be that fine line. It bugs me sometimes, but I do respect other’s boundaries and self placed limitations if they “ask” me to. but if not,SKY’S the limit. When I’m able to be “unleashed” and talk freely that’s when I’m alive, expanding. It’s kind of what I live for. What I’ve found to be the case 90% of the time is that people WANT to talk about it, and are jumping at the chance. Whatever “it” is..paranormal, energy, clairvoyance, telepathy, connection, most people are interested and also have there own experiences. They jump at the chance to talk and share and discuss openly without having to say, “this may sound weird…”. I always tell people – NOTHING sounds weird. You can not freak me out. The things I’ve seen…heard, felt, experienced..and things there are just no human words for…THAT’S the good stuff. Show me what you’ve got.

    And honestly thinking about it, when the line is placed, I usually split. Otherwise, I’m bored. It makes me feel disconnected when others are choosing to hold themselves back and self limit. I’m into the guts of it, and small talk is not the guts. I know that sounds snooty, but it’s kind of how it is. If I can’t be who I am around you, then your limits are holding ME back, so Peace and good luck but I’m OUT!

  • Ash

    I know what you mean! Sometimes I feel like I have to be an internet troll – I work at a corporate job so if I started posting things and writing stuff all over the internet and my company found out… I’m not really sure what would happen. They’d probably just think I’m crazy lol

  • Paranormalogistically

    I don’t talk to many people outside of the paranormal field. My boyfriend doesn’t even realize how big a para-nerd I am. I mean I search for articles to post on facespace and try to write a blog here…spend almost all of my free time researching and investigating the unknown and yet I am not entirely out of the paranormal closet in my “ordinary” life. It is gratifying and inspiring to find like-minded people here, where I feel comfortable talking paranormal.

  • Marilyn Painter

    There is nothing more freeing than standing in your truth! Accepting EVERYTHING about you; your physical appearance, emotions, talents, qualities, interests, ideas, passions, and what drives you. Joy in living is found when you express your true self in all that you do…in personal and professional life. Denying the light in you because someone may be uncomfortable is giving away your power to create, express and live your life to it’s fullest and giving it to them. For you can only be fully living when you accept all of you. The advice I give my 14 yr old daughter is, “If you find yourself hiding an aspect of who you are with your friends for the sake of them not judging you, then you would benefit from looking at that aspect you are hiding and see what about it you; yourself has not accepted.”

    When I went full force into the journey of developing my skills as an intuitive medium and spiritual energy healer, my world turned upside down and a year of intense overhaul was catapulted. I found myself reassessing who I was, what was real, and personal relationships went through tremendous cleansing. Some people rode the wave with me and some faded away. But what I learned from the whole experience is 1) Everyone lives in their own reality. 2) You can’t change a person’s opinions/views, nor should you try. Their journey and life experiences are necessary for their growth. 3) Don’t change you for the sake of someone else. 4) Share what you know with those who ask you to share it or who seek the information. 5) Wholeness, Peace, and Balance is found when you don’t have a need for acceptance, approval, or validation of who you are from others nor accept their opinions of you as your truth because you know you and accept all aspects of yourself fully.

    When I worked as a speech-language pathologist in a School District, at first it was awkward in the lunch room. Teachers would complain about their kids, life, and talk about various aspects of their lives. My psychic skills would kick in and messages of guidance would come through for them. Do I tell them? I’m not ashamed of me so why would I not tell them. So I did. Yes some where uncomfortable and I noticed they chose to sit away from me at the table. But, those that accepted me and wanted to know more, hung out with me at lunch. Several scheduled reading sessions with me after school!

    Now I use my intuitive mediumship skills full time and I love every minute. I currently don’t have as much income as I did as a Speech-Language Pathologist, but I am so much happier doing what resonates with me.
    You can create your reality exactly as you want it!

    Sorry I got windy 😉

    • Patrick

      Thank you for that, Marilyn. You know I’ve always looked up to you because of how brave you’ve been in the last few years. You’ve certainly played a big role in my journey.

  • Patrick

    So today has been the biggest day for views since I started blogging. Hmmm… a lot of people with closet issues? 😉

  • Marilyn Painter

    Hanging out with a group of people with the same interests is a great way to release the need to share our experiences. Especially those in the paranormal and spiritual fields. A group that we don’t have to sensor our words and opinions with the comfort of knowing that everyone there is just as “weird” as we are. Sometimes we have some profound experiences that sharing them with others helps us to process and understand more fully. And questions come up that others may have experienced and we can learn from and gain more insight.

    What about having a once a month group gathering consisting of those in the field of paranormal/spiritual and anyone who has strong interests in these fields? I would be willing to have it at Ahtah Sanctuary Holistic Center. What do you all think?

    • Ash

      That would be really awesome, actually- I’m currently in a psychic development class (17 people) and we discussed a couple of weeks ago getting together somewhere once or twice a month to practice when the class gets over….might be interesting!

      • Marilyn Painter

        I’m offering my place: Ahtah Sanctuary Holistic Center. It is 300 Jungermann Rd in St.Peters. Friend me on Facebook at Ahtah Sanctuary and we can coordinate if you like.

    • Patrick

      Marilyn and Ash… I’ve been tossing around the idea for a few weeks of starting a spirit circle or seance group and documenting it through the blog. I was going to post more on that tonight. Thoughts?

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